For some time I have been thinking about writing about the powerful word NO and by chance, a few days ago the man with the eternal smile Guy Kawasaki did it:
https://guykawasaki.substack.com/p/the-art-of-saying-no . For those who do not know him, I highly recommend his posts and interventions for example at TED.
The truth is that during my life I have learned that saying “No” is not a sign of weakness or lack of commitment, but a tool. I have learned that saying “No” is not only a method to manage overload, but a strategic act that allows you to prioritize, optimize resources and get the best out of yourself and those who depend on you (personally and at work).
In his article, Kawasaki highlights that saying “No” is an underrated skill that requires practice, clarity and courage. The inability to refuse requests can lead to compromises that cause us to lose focus and consume valuable resources. Christina Wootke’s book “Radical focus” is also very interesting on this topic. In my life I have countless situations where saying “Yes” to everything would have resulted in family disputes, missed deadlines or promises, exhausted teams and mediocre results. Instead, a well-founded “No” made it possible to stay the expected course in every situation, although not without receiving long faces in the first few moments. Kawasaki emphasizes that saying “No” is not a personal rejection, but can even mean aligning every decision with the organization’s strategic objectives (if they exist :/), whether it’s modernizing legacy systems, implementing a data governance strategy or leading a migration to the cloud.
The Context: The Pressure to Say “Yes.”
Whether by culture or context, we find that the pressure to say “Yes” is omnipresent. Without getting personal, as professionals we face an onslaught of requests: new projects, additional meetings, system integrations, adoption of emerging technologies, and many tasks that are not aligned with strategic objectives. The temptation to please everyone can lead to overload, dilution of focus, and ultimately failure to deliver real value. In other words, please no one.
Saying “Yes” to everything may seem like a way to demonstrate commitment or flexibility, but it often results in burned-out teams, ill-defined projects, constant direction changes and mediocre results . One example is the F-35 fighter where several sources comment that one of the biggest problems with this aircraft is that there are too many people to please . The inability to set clear boundaries can divert resources away from key initiatives, this is where the power of saying “No” comes into play.
Why Saying “No” Is So Difficult
As we can infer from our day-to-day lives and as Kawasaki points out, saying “No” can be uncomfortable because we fear disappointing others or missing opportunities. In the business and technical environment, this challenge is amplified by several factors:
- pressure from stakeholders: customers, executives and internal teams often present urgent requests (the typical I-need-it-yesterday), such as new functionality, integrations or ad hoc reports. Saying “No” to a customer requesting an additional feature may seem risky, especially if you fear damaging the relationship or if your superior tells you to do so.
- Fear of missing opportunities: Many fear that rejecting a request will close doors or damage relationships. Closely related to the previous point.
- Multitasking culture: In technology, the “do it all” mentality is deeply ingrained. Technical teams often face unrealistic expectations to deliver complex projects while responding to secondary requests, often fueled by thoughts like “I’ll get this done in 5 minutes” or “if I say no, it looks like I can’t do it”.
- Lack of strategic clarity: Without a well-defined business architecture or a clear strategy, it is easy to accept tasks that do not add value, basically because you do not know if they contribute to the company’s objectives or not. I have seen in countless situations, how the absence of clear priorities leads teams to work on tasks that do not contribute to the company’s objectives.
The Benefits of Saying “No
Saying “No” is not simply turning down a request; it is a conscious decision to prioritize what really matters. Saying “No” frees up time and energy to focus on what really matters. This practice can transform your approach as a leader, professional and strategist.
- Focus on the strategic: In the enterprise, success depends on aligning technology with business objectives. Saying “No” to projects or tasks that don’t fit with the strategic vision allows teams to focus on high-impact initiatives. Saying “No” forces clarification of priorities.
- Protecting Team Resources: As leaders, one of the main responsibilities is to protect teams from burnout and ensure that their efforts are directed to meaningful tasks. Saying “No” to unnecessary projects or tasks prevents work overload and allows teams to maintain a high level of quality.
- Fostering Innovation: Paradoxically, saying “No” can be a catalyst for innovation. By freeing up time and resources from secondary tasks, teams have the opportunity to explore creative solutions to complex problems. This also helps improve team morale, allowing them to unleash their imagination.
- Strengthening Leadership: Saying “No” in a respectful and reasoned manner is a sign of strong leadership. It demonstrates a clear vision, an understanding of priorities and a willingness to make tough decisions to protect the interests of the project and the team.
- Improved Decision Making: Kawasaki stresses that saying “No” requires evaluating requests with objective criteria. In the enterprise, this means asking many questions such as: Is this task aligned with our enterprise architecture? Does it add value to our data strategy? Is it feasible with available resources? This process strengthens decision making and reduces the risk of committing to unsustainable initiatives.
How to Say “No” Effectively
Saying “No” does not mean being inflexible or closing doors. The key is to do it in a respectful and professional manner. Kawasaki also discusses some tips:
1. Explain “why”: When declining a request, provide a clear explanation based on facts. Avoid ambiguity.
2. Offer alternatives: If possible, suggest solutions that align the request with existing priorities.
3. Be respectful but firm: Use a professional and empathetic tone, but maintain your position.
4. Align with strategy: Relate the decision to the broader goals of the organization. This reinforces the idea that the “No” is not personal, but strategic.
5. Empower teams to say “No”: Leaders should foster a culture where the team can also set boundaries. This is especially important in technical teams, where requests may come directly to developers or analysts and are often not aligned with project objectives.
Moreover, knowing how to say “No” not only offers these immediate benefits, but also transforms the way we work in the long term. Stakeholders will trust more the person who has been able to set reasoned limits to focus on what matters. Teams will lessen their burden associated with issues that do not really add strategic value. The person who practices it is forced to clarify values, priorities and vision, which makes him/her a more confident and effective leader. And many more benefits.
In other words, it’s not about rejecting for the sake of rejecting, but about making conscious decisions that maximize value, protect teams and keep the focus on what really matters. A well-founded “No” can be transformative.
So the next time you’re faced with a request that doesn’t fit your priorities, take a deep breath, evaluate the implications, and don’t be afraid to say “No” (even if it’s hard at first). By doing so, you’ll not only be protecting your time and resources, but you’ll also be taking a step toward more strategic and focused leadership.